Archive for Words

Words that should never be used:

Posted in Aggravations with tags , , , on February 11, 2011 by Mitch Leuraner

Crampons

This word is just awful.  I know what crampons are, and why one would use them.  I’m sure they come in very handy (footy?). But there is absolutely no excuse for the name. Call them “boot spikes”, call them “mountain feet”, call them “spikey-so-I-can-get-up-the-mountain-without-dying-things”.

I don’t care what you call them.

Just don’t call them crampons!

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Words I wish I could still use:

Posted in Random, Words with tags , on October 20, 2010 by Mitch Leuraner

Booya!

I don’t think I got enough use out of this one before it went away.

Seriously.

A truly ‘Generic Love Poem’

Posted in Finds, Words with tags , , , , on April 7, 2010 by Mitch Leuraner

I found this poem earlier tonight on Hello Poetry:

Generic Love Poem

by Kirsty MacDonald

Call a                          doctor/ plumber/ priest*
My heart is               broken/ leaking/ deceased*
My life is                   worthless/ so much better/ over*
I’m going to              kill myself/ tell your wife/ Dover*
How could you         leave me/ not know/ lie?*
I hope you                return my stuff/ come back/ die*
I’ll never                   forget you/ forgive you/ go away*
I need                        closure/ a DNA test/ to tell you I’m gay*
Your                           face/ crotch/ top of your back*
Is                                so beautiful/ lumpy/ unusually slack*
Your                           ex/ mother/ best friend from school*
Always made me      great coffee/ feel inadequate/ drool*
I will                           miss you/ kill you/ stalk you forever*
That way we can      be friends/ get away with it/ be together*
I’m sorry                   you did this/ I did this /we failed*
I promise to               pay you/ dye it back/ get you bailed
Please don’t               leave me/ show the Polaroids/ write or call*

(*delete as appropriate, just delete it all…..)

Very clever!

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Your lies

Posted in Words with tags , , on February 8, 2010 by Mitch Leuraner

are so transparent.

I don’t know if I am more upset

by the lies proper

or

the fact that you think

I am stupid enough to believe.

Now:

Posted in Words with tags , on February 8, 2010 by Mitch Leuraner

you run,

I wait,

we pretend.

For how long?

Paying

Posted in Words with tags , , on February 8, 2010 by Mitch Leuraner

your share,

of utility bills,

of grocery bills,

of our common everyday life expenses,

is not unreasonable.

You lie

Posted in Words with tags , , on February 8, 2010 by Mitch Leuraner

to friends,

to family,

to my face.

I lie awake.