Denial

Whoever said that absence makes the heart grow fonder was in denial.  What absence actually does is make the mind grow suspicious, and it happens that we tend to rationalize that suspicion by calling it love.

Of course most of the time the suspicion in subconscious.  We have no idea that the sick feeling in the pit of the stomach is a product of millions of years of evolution that have conditioned us to be worried about losing a partner.  We just know that the feeling goes away when that partner returns.

Other times the suspicion is more obvious. We start to think about things that the partner could be doing without us – terrible things that we know we could never live with.  And that is when accusations are made – whether they be spoken out loud, or just in the mind.  Of course, this suspicion is merely a form of jealousy that grows as it feeds on itself.

Jealous suspicion begins so easily, and it is a byproduct of loving someone enough to worry about losing them.

But let’s face it, jealous suspicion is no more love itself than is the beating a jealous husband gives his wife ‘for her own good’.

No, absence does not make the heart grow fonder.

On the other hand,  absinthe – now that’s another story…